Mandala of Hearts: a healing mandala.

Trying to make sense of a destructive pain that seems irrational, impossible to reason with, born out of fears of faceless illusions of the reality, pervasive shame and self-inflicted harsh judgements.

Trying to find a way out of the darkness and back to the light to the right path, to the guiding star of what really matters.

For very long moments, all seems lost in pain and despair, and more I resist and struggle, more entangled all become, the only way out is through real acceptance, patient stillness and attentive silence, and when nothing seems to be working, the healing starts and from a real pain born out of illusionary fears, a timid spring of love starts to emerge. Out of the darkness, a light joyful Mandala of Hears unfold.

 

Innocent, almost naive Hearts sprung out of twisted lines.

A sense of spontaneous faith and hope that the well of goodness is still full and intact,

that the spring of love inside did not dwindle.

I still judge and measure my life with, by now and for a long while, old and ineffective, judgements and measures.

My thoughts are slower than my heart to recognise the conclusion that

All is well where stillness lies,    

All is safe at the heart of my being.

These innocent maybe frivolous hearts surprise me.

Had I forgotten how or maybe never was light and impractical?

Had I forgotten how or maybe never was romantic and whimsical?

I gave up so much for what? To preserve an illusionary sense of safety and security?

Innocent, sweet looking Hearts are True Joy. The True Joy that scares me and that I’m sceptical of out of fear, but that now I can see and feel. They are the colours, the light, the comfort and the love that has always been here but not seen, not recognised and not acknowledged till now.

Innocent, playful  Hearts are what I found at the heart of my being at the end of a long dark moment, still and always unscathed regardless of what happens on the outside or what the external world tells me.

I endeavoured to keep them hidden ashamed and mistakenly thinking them not worthy of being cherished and cared for.

I engaged in and failed repeatedly to live a life that was not mine to live, to find acceptance and love where there was none to be found.

Now I let these playful, forever young and wise Hearts out, to show me how to live, to thoroughly experience Joy and Sadness, Trust and Fear, Love and Loss.

 

 

Love who you are,

Accept who you are as you are,

Believe in and Trust that who you are is all you need to be,

Be who you are,

Act Courageously and Compassionately for who you are as you are.

I Love who I am,

I accept who I am as I am,

I believe and I trust that who I am is all I need to be,

I am who I am,

I act courageously and compassionately for who I am as I am.